F?lamin Yon Reviews: Any Way I Can

It’s F’lamin Yon here to tell you about Robert Prion’s direction of Any Way I Can, and may I start by saying, “In any and every way—yes you can!”

John Dante is up first with newcummer Peter Ericson. After a walk from the beach, they warm each other up on the couch and floor before John tops Peter. For a newcummer, Peter impressed F’lamin Yon with his ‘not so virgin-like’ demeanor. Your phone will soon be ringing off the hook Peter with casting calls. Hopefully you’ll find time to call Me… =)

Next, newcummer Jason Leery and Rob Walker begin to touch base with each other before Zepher - another newcummer - joins in on the fun, and is the lucky one who gets to tattoo ‘em both. Fingers and tongues were used early and often in this scene, and made F’lamin Yon want to joust with another tongue over a piece of love meat.

Scene three starts with the superstar Cameron Taylor cumming home from the gym. While on the phone talking to a friend, he fantasizes about a beautiful specimen he saw at the gym named Leonardo. Cameron envisions Leonardo stroking himself (lucky hands) and you get to see the hardbody and the superstar work on their own meat in split screen shots. This scene is sizzling and F’lamin Yon needed a bubble bath prior to finishing the movie. Ooh, child, if touching myself is wrong, I don’t wanna be right!

Next, Jay Richards shows newcummer B.J. Andrews the tricks of the trade and welcomes B.J. with open arms… well, open hands and mouth. Jay mounts B.J. with a few of his well loved positions before spreading the mayo on his ass sandwich. This fiery scene made F’lamin Yon want to take a trip to the ‘Hard Rock’ Café. Everyone deserves to treat themselves to a lovely inning and outing every now and then…

Finally, the utopian awakening in a scene with Rob Walker, Robby Taylor and Tyler Morgan! They each believe in equal opportunity and compliment each other very, very well. If wishes came true, F’lamin Yon would wake up every morning this way. F’lamin Yon will now leave the door unlocked from now on… *wink*wink.

Any Way I Can is a fun, well-directed film. F’lamin Yon used 7 face towels to shine the TV screen. Now, off to yoga class. Muah!!!

F?lamin Yon Reviews: Very Basic Training

Miami Studios’ Very Basic Training is just that—very basic. F’lamin Yon was none too appreciative of the boring content and, although those sailors were cutie patooties, F’lamin Yon ended up sea sick…

Scene 1 has a young sailor playing with himself, but it looks SOOOOO NOT HOT. He sits there on the bed just looking bored, the cameraman amateurly trying to walk him through the scene, but honey, his release looks more forced than anything. And F’lamin Yon does not like stupid conversation when getting in touch with himself. This scene was soooo unclimactical.

Next is a shy Vietnamese sweetie that lubes his spring roll like the newcummer he is. Again, meaningless conversation takes place and it looks like he needs to be left alone. The cameraman talk is not necessary… another cock is! And his poor little member looked so suffocated in his hands that it made F’lamin Yon yearn to lend it some much needed affection.

Scene 3 brings in a warm couple (finally!), and the dumb-ass cameraman tries to stir up some drama between the lovely twosome. F’lamin Yon wanted to cut off the cameraman’s penis (forgive F’lamin Yon) with a dull butter knife for even going there. How are they supposed to make love when you’re stirring up a negative environment Mr. Cameraman? Sheesh… Major mood killer.

Then in scene 4 a Spanish/Greek mixed breed looks disinterested with both the conversation and the cameraman. His member is uncomfortable and fails to wake up, according to F’lamin Yon’s eyes. It would not rise to the occasion for a lonnnng time, and looks as if it’s on life support. F’lamin Yon would’ve given it some mouth to cock resuscitation…

Scene 5 deals with a cutie named Lou who didn’t look as desperate as the cameraman was making him. This scene took foreverrrrrrrrrrrrrrr to start—are we shooting singles ads here or a movie? F’lamin Yon couldn’t take it anymore halfway into another drowsy scene and, although a professional, had to press the fast forward button. It pains F’lamin Yon to do this, but it was a must.

F’lamin Yon gave the final scene a little sneak peek—only to be disappointed again. It was not a good day for F’lamin Yon and F’lamin Yon needed to go out and impulse shop to salvage the rest of the day.

After what felt like a complete waste of time, F’lamin Yon still managed to use 2 face towels, but needed a long, hot shower. The people at Miami Studios need to get bitch slapped for such an unacceptable poor excuse of a “film”. F’lamin Yon can get more hot from looking in the mirror at F’lamin Yon’s self without the presence of a dull, mind (and cock) numbing “cameraman”. Very Basic Training is to be left on the shelf, and F’lamin Yon is done… Muah!!!